The idea of exposing one’s self at all levels of being (physical, emotional, spiritual) in order to allow for true vision into who we are, appealed to me even though there was fear and inhibition. My ego had persuading ways to make me feel and think that doing something as audacious as undressing in front of other people who you may or may not know should be considered plain old crazy. Who in their right mind would pay to be that uncomfortable and for what purpose? What I realized through my FreeFall experience was that hiding behind my clothes and my identification with all the ego based belief systems is the true essence of insanity! By venturing down the rabbit hole of fear, judgment and body image misperceptions, I was able to explore an aspect of my being that I never felt was possible. FreeFall is a very powerful experience and is compared to having over 100 BodyTalk sessions in one FreeFall! With this kind of intense exposure incredible transformation can occur.
I have the privilege of coordinating courses for Allison Bachmeier in Calgary, Alberta. During one of our meetings she asked if I would be willing to co-ordinate her FreeFall courses. I said I would, but felt that we needed to have a venue that would be conducive to supporting the transformational aspect of these courses. I initially thought of Hawaii, but a fellow BodyTalker said, “Why not Costa Rica?” The minute she said that I knew that would be an amazing location for FreeFall. I asked Allison if she would be interested and she was all thumbs up. So in March 2017, upon the mountainside just outside of San Juan, Costa Rica, six daring women ventured out of their comfort zone and allowed themselves to experience transformation.
It was seven days of unforgettable healing. Healing so deep and so authentic that at times you wanted to pinch yourself as you questioned, “is this real?” The yoga retreat that was chosen for the FreeFall courses was better than I could have envisioned. I felt peace, harmony and the freedom to be “me”.
My FreeFall experience lead me to release my insatiable need for control. I am not saying that being organized, reliable and responsible are “bad” things, my problem was that if I did not live up to my expectations of those key belief systems, then I would experience intense stress and anxiety. My FreeFall came at the end of the course essentially after everyone had left except for a colleague of mine and myself who were sharing a room the night before we were scheduled to fly back home at 6 am. That night I woke straight up with the dread of realizing that I did not take my passport or personal items out of the safety deposit box the night before and that there was nobody to open the box until 8 am! My greatest fear of losing my important “stuff” came true. I was absolutely overwhelmed with uncontrolled crying, muscle contortions/contractions and the feeling that I really screwed up.
As with all things the experience was meant to teach me something (and I pray that I have gained some wisdom) as my colleague was able to support my “process” and after about 20 minutes I released all my fear and was able to go to the reception area to see what could be done. Everything was locked up, however there was a porter that just showed up (probably heard my whaling earlier) and even though he did not speak English we were able to get him to understand that we needed to get into the safety deposit box. To our joy a few minutes later the assistant manager came in his pj’s and let us into the security box and I was able to retrieve my passport. I gave him such a big hug and thanked him profusely.
To some this event may not sound very intense, but I can honestly say that it was one of the most fearful moments of my life and I can say that I was able to go into my fear and allow myself to release the belief systems that were holding the fear and judgment in place. As my colleague and I were waiting to take the shuttle to the airport, we were laughing as we recalled the events which took place only an hour before. I have to admit that some of the laughter may be the effects of some wine that was consumed, but heh, somewhere in the world the clock hands were passed noon!
To answer the question, “What is it to FreeFall”, I think it is to live life without being ruled by fear.